{a cure}

i have found the remedy for being unable to sleep. it worked in a flash. want to know what it is?
first, remember you must follow these directions exactly or it. wont. work.

1. Do some rainbow meditation courtesy of a CD you got in Stress Management class

2. Think about little windows in your body and colors bursting from them and repeating things such as: i am grounded. i am centered. i am loved. etc. until you cant think of them anymore

3. Count as high as you can as slow as you can until your thoughts drift somewhere else and you forget youre supposed to be counting

4. Lay on your back for 12 minutes contimplating what to do with your life

5. Roll over onto your stomach and squish your face in the pillow so you have to keep your eyes closed

6. Go to the bathroom

7. Get back in bed and try not to think about a thing

8. Sit up and scratch your legs for awhile to get the blood flowing

9. Take 2 pillows and 1 down comforter and go downstairs

10. Sit in the recliner and talk to your roommate

11. Play 2 games of Yahtzee on your cellular communication device

12. Lay on the couch listening to the whir of the dryer

13. Turn on the TV but keep the volume down as not to disturb the 4 other sleeping princesses

14. Flip channels for a while

15. Watch Dr. G Medical Examiner and find out why a very fat man died (heart attack)

16. Watch Paris Hilton's New BFF and see the tragedy of getting kicked out of her hottub unfold

17. Watch Good Eats and learn about making rice out of potatoes, and potato soup, and potato salad, and other things out of different varities of potatos

18. Turn off the TV

19. Lay on the ground with your ear pressed to the floor listening to the thump thump thump of the neighbors music

20. Drift off to sleep trying to decide what they are listening to

21. Wake up 2 hours later in the same position you fell asleep in, making it very difficult to move your stiff muscled arms

22. Move back to the couch

23. Find a comfortable position on the couch, must take atleast 20 minutes doing so

24. Flip pillows multiple times to get to the cold side

25. Wake up 1.5 hours later to the sound of your alarm clock

seriously folks, it works. try it. i did it last night and got amazing results.


oh yeah, Happy 200th Post. 3 year and only 200 posts? im one lame sauce blogger